Our local community is especially rife with pseudo science & faith healers of every sort. My neighborhood is quite typical of southern Utah, we enjoy a:
1- Pathologically happy ‘Ward Shaman” She will merrily convince you that childhood immunizations cause autism, and asthma. Flu shots kill the elderly, cause migraines and are a form of government mind control.
2-The pungent smelling family (do they swim in essential oils?) This family lives on raw vegetables and green tea. They have no body fat. They don’t smile, they grimace ---and appear like Bataan death March survivors. They distrust the Federal Government and see black helicopters everywhere
3-More chiropractors per capita than ants on a dropped lollypop. These untrained magicians now specialize in any ailment you can imagine from Hemorrhoids to Cancer.
In counterpoint to my profession, our local quacks rely on hype & testimonials to sell their cures.
Do full page adds in the newspapers and flashy salesmanship “educate” the populace better than dry evidence based research...You bet it does!
Here is something to think about as you sample magic juice form Polynesia, or as you clench your teeth holding in that herbal enema!: Please realize the person offering this unorthodox treatment is SELLING SOMETHING. Yes, though they seem to care more than a boring M.D., nearly all these shamen rely on multilevel marketing to sell their cures—often using friendships & ward contacts for sales. (Note: this is an especially wicked form of priestcraft which originated in Utah valley.)
Occasionally I used to question our modern snake oil salesman. “Has your product been subjected to real scientific testing?” (e.g. A blinded study with large enough sample size to be statistically significant), they initially look confused then quickly recover and glare at me like Moses looking down on the golden calf! They then reply; “I’ve read accounts of 5 people who have had their lives completely changed by Tonga Juice 10!”
Interestingly this “magical group” is also quite narrow minded in its attitudes and beliefs, for example:
1-They feel that prayerfully listening to Glen Beck will save America & the constitution.
They also LOVE conspiracies:
2*“Obama is secretly a practicing Muslim”,
3*“The AMA has a cure for cancer but keeps it hidden”
4*“The Air Force has a saucer & a collection of dead aliens at area 51
5*“This tree bark extract will help you live to 200! But big Pharma has bribed the FDA into refuting our claims” ---so we have to market it as a ‘Food Additive”
Sadly, once reputable big companies have jumped on the pseudoscience bandwagon: Ignoring the line between fact & fantasy they now market products that “Promote Colon health” and “support your immune system!” -- using obscure claims can’t be proven or disproven.
It is Ok by me if you want to believe in magnetic bracelets, crystals, healing blue light, chiropractic or energy alignment. My only request is “Don’t show up at my workplace and expect to me to buy into your beliefs, my profession is not magic based!
Here are a few frustrating examples of my workplace interactions with this crowd:
1-Hypertensive man; this intelligent appearing 55 year old man arrived in the ED one night complaining of two years of headaches. I note that his blood pressure is an impressive 200/145. When I remarked on this finding he stated, “Oh it has been high for years”. My Physician initially tried me on several different medications but all of them have potential side effects. He then smiled and stated” Then I found Dr Bill (Chiropractor) He is wonderful, I have been taking his natural medications for years no side effects.”—I sighed inwardly.
After a medical evaluation I stated that the headaches were probably due to hypertension and that he was at risk for heart attack or stroke. He smiled and rolled his eyes in disbelief “Dr Bill said you would try to frighten me”. After my careful explanation of hypertension treatment in the 21st century he again scoffed and said “Dr Bill also said you would try to give me toxic pills”. In frustration, I finally asked him “Why are you here in the ED wasting both our time if you distrust mainstream medicine??? He angrily stomped out of the department.” ( I hope Dr Bill will treat this guy after his stroke)
2-Cancer Woman. This skeletal and jaundiced patient also presented in the middle of the night. She was short of breath and frightened. She told me her story: About three years previously she was diagnosed with early stage breast cancer. “Friends” warned her about the “Medical Conspiracy, ´ They also told of the painful surgery and the very unpleasant chemotherapy that would follow. They then introduced her to an Alternative medicine cancer clinic in Mexico. This clinic boasts of exclusively holistic treatments and achieves a near 100% cure rate. Sadly, it was now three years and $100,000.00 dollars later and she looked and felt terrible. I felt my throat tighten in pity as I stared at her jaundiced and emaciated form on the gurney. The cancer had metastasized throughout her body affecting nearly every organ system. I offered her referral to an oncologist but knew at this late stage she would be offered only palliative care. Even worse, her husband angrily took her home when I began speaking of hospice care. Three weeks later, I saw her obituary in the newspaper---I know hospice could have made her last weeks on earth much better but she was denied even that by her ignorant husband.
I could give many more examples of individuals who turn to science save them after magic has failed...
I’m now at peace with naive patients & magicians
I firmly believe all people have a right their own belief system.
But my request is simply this: If you pick magic, please stay with it. We the mainstream medical community are overwhelmed and overburdened with legitimately ill patients in need of help…we simply don’t have time for you magical thinkers. See your chiropractor, see your shaman, drink your grass juice and stay out of my #*&?@^% ER !
XOXO
Dr Who
I am all about "real" medicine. I like the idea of magic but know deep down like all magic, the wizard is behind the curtain doing what is best for him so OZ will rely on his wisdom without ever questioning where he came from.
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